It has been a while since I last wrote. I've since been through the procedure with flying colors. I was sleeved on May 15th. I've been a bit better doing my facebook page than this blog. But as I'm finding I really don't have any hobbies, I'm gonna make this blog my hobby :) I hope my readers enjoy the things to come.
Today is an emotional day for me. I'm almost ready to go back to work, but fear the state of things to come. You see, when I go back, I will have a whole new department and I will be the only stable person there...with the business knowledge of how the department operates. I find that I get extremely tired around 3-4 which would be JUST in time for my hour commute home. I'm going to have to try to make it through, since I go back next week.
I couldn't sleep last night....maybe due to the horrid dreams I've been having...due to the amount of worrying I've been doing. So, I get up and do some chores. Done with that by 6:30 AM so I decide to eat an early breakfast. It is after all the most important meal of the day. By 7 AM, I am back in my perpetual boredom state. So, off to Facebook I go to play.
I see a few people that I used to be close to many moons ago. I start to think...what happened? I know what happened. I sat on the sidelines and allowed my life and the life of my only child pass me by. For gatherings, I made excuses to miss things. I became a hermit. I think back to the things I should have done and think I really didn't seize the moment. I know....I know...the past is the past and there is nothing to do about it. However, I have decided that I am no longer going to sit it out, my life that is. I'm going to start living and stop caring what other people think (my major downfall). Why do I care so much? I don't even know. Maybe it's the way I'm wired. I've always been the caretaker type of person. Deep down, maybe it's because I'm so heavy that I don't think I'm worthy. Something to ponder....
No comments:
Post a Comment